5×02 The Beauty and the Feast – Recap

This post won’t end too well, but it won’t be cruel either. That being sad, I really didn’t like much last night’s episode. It was well written, nothing to say, but somehow I wasn’t trapped by it like I was last week. And no, is not that I didn’t like the episode because there wasn’t any CB scene. Reasons are deep, and go beyond that. Is more what I as a viewer, I’ve felt.

My rating is 5.5/10. And you, what did you think?

Episode opens with Blair and Dorota at the Doctor’s studio. Dorota has just had her (I guess) first ultrasound, and Blair seems so interested in this, the maid doesn’t get why. Blair says Louis will go to France to celebrate something and that his sister is going to pick him up in few hours. Conversation seem to go normally until Blair asks the Doctor some burning questions.

How long the morning sickness will last?
What about breasts sensitivity?
How long till she can determine the father of her child?

Dorota is clearly unamused. Something is wrong since we all know who the father of Dorota’s baby is. Blair is asking questions for herself because she still can’t accept she is pregnant. And Dorota finds out. “You are pregnant too!” and adds a “We’re like sisters now! Cousins. Distant cousins.” lol, gotta love Dorota.

Next we find Chuck and Nate at the Empire. Chuck is looking at a magazine with a Blair/Louis picture on it that is actually from 4.02. Funny how GG Writers love to parallel episodes, they also did this with Chuck’s 4.01/4.02 and 5.01/5.02 outfits. Anyway he sees the magazine and when Nate joins him in the living room after a girl has just left, Nate confesses Chuck his “problems”. Chuck suggests he may use Viagra, but Nate’s problem isn’t there there. Problem is Nate wants to find out the name of the woman he slept with in LA, and so he’s searching for her everywhere. Chuck blames it on Nate’s mommy issues and tells him tha someone called, Nate gets all excited but turns out it was his mother. lol. Chuck seems all giddy while giving Nate sort of advice, he’s drinking coffee for a change.


Back to Brooklyn, hot daddy Rufus is preparing something while Dan is trying to figure out who is the person that’s going to publish his book so he can ask him not to do it. This task seems difficult, so he makes a call to ask for  help. Serena is the person he calls. He asks about tips to break into bank accounts since Serena did it with her mother’s, but Serena says it was only because Chuck slept with the woman at the bank… suggests Dan to ask him. Dan doesn’t seem to happy to do so, though. Serena tells him Charlie is also there and he asks “What cousin call me Serena, Charlie?” lol. They end the call and Dan goes on the Gossip Girl website to see where Chuck is at.

Uh oh, then Charlie appears again on screen. I don’t care much about her storyline at the moment, but I may think that she’s going to do a Gabriel/Poppy scheme when she’s back to New York, although Max doesn’t seem like that type of con man guy. I don’t know why.

Scene at the Waldorfs with Blair/Louis and… Beatrice. Louis’s sister arrives and compliments on Blair’s appearance, and Blair soon turns up her nose on her. She has a smelly scent and Blair’s pregnant woman sensibility doesn’t seem to be fond of it “Do you like it?” “It’s powerful”… (lol) Also, Blair is already thinking she may not be in Beatrice’s good graces because she hasn’t quite the charm to the Grimaldi women. Louis wants Blair to go to the feast with him. Dorota adds they’re going to celebrate “Virgin’s Mary road to heaven” which occurs on August 15th (I know because I am Catholic and it’s a celebration here too). Honestly, who believes Beatrice?

“They say misery loves company. But sometimes is the company that makes you miserable.”

We see Charlie and Serena eating and Serena asking Charlie to live together, while in NYC Blair is still with Louis and sister, and seems in the middle of a sickness while she’s eating a strawberry. Beatrice in fact tells Blair she’s gonna leave later, and not that morning as she expected, so they can spend some time together. I can see from Blair’s face that besides morning sickness she isn’t really excited to do so.

Dan finally finds Chuck. He’s in an alley, with his shirt off. Wow, at first I thought it was Ed rehearsing but then I was pleased Chuck decided not to stain his pink shirt while those guys he paid were beating him up. The guys stop acting once Dan arrives. Chuck asks for a refund (this is the second time he mentions the word) and Dan asks if Chuck is alright. “I was until you arrived” he says, but Dan sees his bruise and isn’t convinced by his answer. Chuck doesn’t give further info and leaves.

Dan follows Chuck to his suite where we find Nate making brownies and still looking for the woman he had sex in LA. “I’m not Serena, Humphrey. I didn’t need saving” Chuck tells Dan before heading to his bedroom. Loved this so much. Dan meets Nate and tells him he found Chuck in an alley and that he was pretty bruised already, he thinks that he’s doing that to get Blair’s attention. Nate tells him Chuck has been okay the whole summer while they were together. Dan suggests that he sees a doctor because C’s bruise can get worse, Nate agrees and informs him he’ll let him know what the doctor will say.

Next Blair and Beatrice are walking next to a park. They are talking about pre-wedding dresses to use at events, and Blair is happy to let her know what she’d like to wear when Louis’s sister tells her the ugly truth. She can’t wear bare shoulders dresses, exposed legs, anything form-fitting because the code is mandated. Blair wonders why then Beatrice can wear what she likes, and she explains that it’s because she isn’t the reigning sibling and so she isn’t restricted to that code. Blair also comments she read Beatrice’s interview on the Guardian, and she says she felt as if she was eager to be the sibling heir. She answers that she is of course, but people were watching her every move so she felt pressed and decided it wasn’t a thing for her but that Blair can be a princess more than she would be. We then find L’s sis asking Blair for a snack, but Blair excuses her because she needs a restroom. L’s sister starts wondering.

Brief part with Serena and Charlie checking their future apartment in LA, then focus back on NYC. Doctor has just checked on Chuck, and he says that apparently he has broken ribs? He can’t mess around with that since he could end up puncturing a lung. Predictable, predictable. I have written a scene like this in my S5 inspired fic. Guess I am either smart, or the writers predictable. lol. Chuck doesn’t seem to give a damn though, and the doctor sees how he is uncaring. He doesn’t  believe someone can bear pain at the point Chuck is enduring it. His bruises are dangerous, so the Doctor asks Nate to keep an eye on him. Chuck should only rest in his opinion.And in mine too.

Focus is back on Blair and Beatrice. Back from their shopping day, Blair has only bought a lipstick while Beatrice wanted to go to more places. Blair rushes upstairs soon blaming that she drank too much coffee, while Beatrice remains there. Dorota approaches her and suggests she accompanies her to the elevator, but she doesn’t want to leave. She supposes Blair has a disease or something, or perhaps she takes drugs. Dorota of course defends Blair, but when Beatrice guesses right that Blair has had bulimia, she admits it then regrets it. Beatrice doesn’t believe her, and calls her brother. She tells Louis Blair has an eating disorder, and he says he already knows and that it’s in her past. Beatrice fights that she acted like she was still bulimic one hour before, but Louis is sure to prove her wrong.

Blair is in her room talking to Dorota and says she’s tired. She asks her maid not to say that word out loud (pregnant) because they have no idea who might be lurking. Blair is right someone is lurking, Louis and his sister get in the room and he’s eager to tell her he arranged their priest to have the feast there in a local church so can Blair can also attend her first Monegasque celebration. She doesn’t seem happy about it.

“What don’t you get? Unlike Serena, when I rejected you, I meant it” Chuck greets Dan in his suite. Dan asks him for help but Chuck says no. Then Dan suggests he should rest instead of going out like he seems he’s about to. He says it won’t help puncturing a lung to get Blair’s attention, but Chuck doesn’t seem to care about that. Dan knows nothing about that situation. Dan is sure Blair is over Chuck (in your dreams) because he doesn’t know they had a full carnal knowledge session shorty before summer begun. “That hurt? I wish I could feel it.”

Blair has changed into a light gold dress and she’s now at the Catholic church with Louis and his sister. Here we meet Father Cavalia, the priest that’s gonna marry Blair and Louis (hello guy from Lost Season 4 haha). Blair seems to want to confess, but unfortunately she can’t because of the celebration. Beatrice teases Blair with a Barbagiuan and Blair looks disgusted. She eats it a bit then while Louis and sister go a bit far from her, she talks with a statue of the Virgin Mary… hilarious. Then she sees Dan. He’s came there to talk to her about Chuck, but Blair is in need of a restroom again to answer him. Blair makes the ladies in the bathroom leave so that she can be alone while Dan guards the door, but Dan doesn’t leave and remains there while Blair throws up in the bathroom. He doesn’t want to listen to her there because it may ruin their friendship (lol) so she suggests him to run the water and be a gentleman. Dan tells her Chuck is doing things to get her attention, but Blair explains it’s not about her because he told her to marry Louis. Dan assumes then that Chuck isn’t the only person freaking out and that Blair’s disorder has came back because she’s stressed, but Blair confesses she is pregnant and isn’t sick at all. Fate wants Louis’ sister to overhear and Blair rush to her to stop her from telling Louis, and she keeps the promise but she makes up something about serving homeless people food. Guess this is the price to pay for silence… Dan receives a blast while they are talking and leaves to save Chuck again. Bah.

Chuck is being beaten up in an alley when Dan arrives, and he also gets a punch on his lip… he wants Chuck to stop because he could die, then Chuck asks the guys to stop. He wonders why he’s doing that, and Chuck explains he hoped to feel something. He doesn’t feel anything when he sees Blair with Louis, when he jumps off a building or crashes a motorcycle. Neither Dan irritates him anymore. Is like has if his life ended that night of May and nothing helped him to move on from that anymore. *cries*

Dan accompanies Chuck to his suite and bings what he may has (lol this is weird but the Humphreys are the BING brothers). He suspects he has a little P.T.S.D. after the psychological trauma he felt when he realized he was losing Blair forever. Dan tells Chuck he should heal trying to feel again. Good emotions, not pain. He suggests he could tickle him if he wants (think how funny it would be… then we’d fall in the homoerotic sphere) and Chuck says he would call other people to do so if that’s the case (lol again). Anyway he asks Dan what help he needed from him. Dan tells him about the book, and Chuck is avaiable to help him. He seems eager sooner or later Charlie Trout is also coming back.

We see Louis’ sister at some point that’s in a limo witht he priest. She confesses him that she didn’t tell Louis about Blair’s pregnancy because her mother would be happy of the news. Between Beatrice and Sophie there seems to be bad blood. She wants the title her mother wants to give to Louis, and she has to sabotage him and Blair in order to make him appear unsuitable for the role. We see her kiss the priest next, in a Thorn Birds fashion.

Last scene we see is Blair going to Dan’s house. Again like last week, she goes there because Dan is the only friend she’s got there that knows the truth. I figured she can’t tell Chuck (obviously) or Nate. If she’d tell Nate, I’m sure he would tell Chuck and then her secret won’t be a secret anymore. She asks Dan how Chuck is and Dan cuts saying it’s difficult and a sort of Freudian thing to explain, so they move further. She says she hoped denial would help the coping mechanism, but morning sickness and other pregnancy things have made that impossible. Dan tells her she has options, and she says she knows and that has considered them all. No matter what, the baby was conceived out of love and so she’s gonna keep it. Dan supposes she didn’t want to tell Louis because the baby might actually be Chuck’s, but Blair is convinced that one time at the Bat Mitzvah can’t suffice since she’s slept with Louis more. By the sheer of possibilities it must be Louis’ in her opinion.

Dan doesn’t seem to completely agree because he says major possibilities doesn’t mean that is sure 100% that it’s Louis. That one time with Chuck may have been the time she got pregnant. Dan adds she should also do something for the baby, find out who the father is. But Blair doesn’t want to lose everything for a night of transgression with Chuck. Not that she doesn’t love him anymore, but right now that’s what he needed her to do. She says that in the restroom to Dan, that Chuck wanted her to let go. That’s why Blair wants to realize her dream now. The baby is an obstacle, a happy obstacle. If the baby is Louis’ then she can only be happy she’s already having a baby before getting married. If it’s Chuck’s like we all hope and think, the baby may be something to overcome her obsession with control. Things didn’t go as planned, but doesn’t mean someone can’t find happiness in other ways.

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About purplebass

hey, you! Thank you for stopping by. I'm Tweety, and I am a girl who loves writing, reading, and watching stuff on TV and write reviews about it. I currently study languages (English and Spanish) @ University here where I live in Italy. I dream to become a teacher or something more impossible, like a writer. For the moment I only write stories on my laptop and review a lot of books. Speaking of which, I'm really into YA despite I am not a teenager anymore, and if you have suggestions, I am always open to hear your book advice! :D

7 thoughts on “5×02 The Beauty and the Feast – Recap

  1. grace says:

    Another predictable episode.
    I know you guys like CD bromance,the homoerotic context,jokes, The Philadelphia Story parallel and stuff.Personally i think suspect but i hope the next episodes change my mind,perhaps.
    I don’t need to mention DB scenes.The good friend who will always be there? That’s another story that i’m very critical because i don’t see him as a bridge that will bring back CB.Maybe he tries to help but at certain point Dan will respect the decisions that will be taken (especially in Blair’s case).
    I would like to see these two stories with more sympathetic eyes,with a more optimistic view but i can’t.

  2. El says:

    1.45 million viewers 😦

    • grace says:

      Once again the ratings was bad.
      Honestly, i would like GG had good ratings because i don’t want to happen the same thing happened to Veronica Mars:insatisfactory pay-off.

  3. GFF says:

    Thanks for the recap. I just don’t like that the writers have made Dan look like the good guy so much in the opening episodes whereas Chuck just looks so lost and all this beating and pain seeking is not appealing to me. They’re propping Dan up to be just the man Blair needs right now and doing the exact opposite for Chuck. That’s how I feel.
    Anyways by Blair specifically saying with Chuck they slept once and with Louis hundreds of times therefore surely Louis is the daddy…its a bit Tongue

  4. GFF says:

    …tongue in cheek like the writers little secret message that “uh gurllllll we all very well know the baby is CHUCK’S”!!

    I’m curious though this has been discussed til we’re all blue in the face but how many of you guys think the baby will be born and live?

  5. L.A.N says:

    When I saw the last scene, I was, like, WTF???? Since when that Blair “always have Dan”???? Since when that Blair let Dan hug her comfortably??? I’m so furious that I couldn’t even rewatch this episode. The way writers force me to swallow Blair/Dan relationship made me wanna throw up. Ugh.

  6. cbisreal says:

    Thank you so much for writing this, I’m for Thailand and I couldn’t watch GG online nor I find it uploaded somewhere. So this really helps me keep up with what’s going on in each ep! Thank you so so much, I cant wait for chair to get back together! They are true!! Thank you for writing!! Ps. I enjoyed reading ur fictions 🙂

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